GReen pRincess kAth..

  I think i should share how i feel.. i had been into a 1 year and almost 5 months relationship, short ar long it doesn’t matter now..haha , The process of moving on has a kick! honestly it was the second time we broke up, but i have to say that this is for REAL. How do you say goodbye to someone you know you love but is strong enough to let you go?I may sound a little bit in mysery, but sharing how i feel is the best way i can let my emotions burst out.

    when we decided to part ways, it was an idea from me first, ” cool off ” as they say,i know exactly why i did that, but he never asked me again for the real reason, i said he changed a lot,, he said i also changed.. if there is one thing permanent in this life it is CHANGE. But i believe that love .. being inlove is a choice, for the second time he easily gave up, or maybe he has his own reasons which he never said to me. We compromise as friends, which is good at first..or i mean to settle things that night we broke up.

    and so here i am,back to my old self, single and available,,haha,,just kidding:p my process of moving on? oh common is there any? The first time it sinked in to me?? denial..haha.. the fairytale already end.. without any happy ending..haha, i have realized so many things of course i know from the start that he could also blame me for what happened to “us” but it was reality dictating that it was  our choice not to fight for each other.

           the process was like a dream.. it was like a nightmare.. how do you start forgetting someone who has been really nice to me and my family.. the answer is happiness, we are in a relationship to be happy.. to support each other, and somehow i would say that i lack giving him the support and time he asked me.. i have been unfair to the guy, but later on you realized that it’s better to let go not to hurt each other anymore. Then acceptance.. i myself have to accept the fact that we can’t be friends that easily.. there are emotional issues..whatever..then when i know that i initiated for it, i was the one having a hard time to move on.. yes, honestly, i believe that there is a time to weigh things for myself.. i was hurt to know that he already forget about me, well i don’t know but i would like to assume for all the things he did.. and i have been hearing, i know some guys really do moving on like a bliss, but definitely i will be really hurt to know that the guy is already seeing another girl.. i don’t know if that is intentional, i just don’t want to get into the details because officially we are not together anymore.

   A guy friend once asked me: ” Bakit ka nasasaktan at umiiyak kung ginusto mo/ nyo naman pareho un break-up nyo?” I say, “this is the first time i am feeling this way, this  is the first heart-break ever, i know i chose to go on with my life , but that doesn’t mean i do not care to the person in just a bliss.. it was just 2 or 3 weeks ago, i hope you understand where i am coming from..i am hurting because i believed that he really did love me.., if at the end of the day i proved myself wrong then i have to accept it. ” “masakit malaman na ung taong minahal mo eh kaya na ulit mag mahal ng iba” i am not saying he does coz he said he is not seeing anyone at the moment.. all i want is for him to be honest, no questions ask. i know he doesn’t have to do it anymore and i can accept it..but please stop showing as if you are clueless.

  As ive’d said moving on is a process.. i leave each day at a time, it’s hard when i see everything that reminds me of him, the simple things that he did for me, all i can say is thank you, im looking forward for better days.. better me.. a new and improved kathy ..kaye..

  i can say that today.. after writing how i feel i am really going to move on! meet new friends.. live my life to the fullest! enjoy life!!

  i like to say thank you to my old and new found friends who never fails to cheer me up,, every rainy days in my life..

  i thank my parents.. my pops for always letting me see that life is not a fairytale.. my nanay who would make fun of my heart problem.

  to you.. who has been there for me lately.. you know who you are.. i appreciate all your efforts to brighten up my day even if we hardly see each other.. the care you have been showing .. even if you always say that i am “spoiled at bad girl” you always show that i can change for myself.. pssssttt.. thank you!

 to myself: hahaha… kaye.. kath..princess to my pops..grow up! make yourself a better woman. i am bruised but not totally broken, just pray to GOD. Love will come my way at the right time!